Coast Guard Boarded My Boat Today!!

[Fr. Frank]

Go fast boats are generally owned by text book examples of males suffering from penis envy. Just my limited impression.

The louder the boat the shorter the ___! Steroids, don't ya know.

(No, not the REAL race boat guys Fr. Frank!)

I dunno, that description fits a great many guys who decided to get into offshore powerboating. Not because they wanted to go fast, but because they desperately wanted to be the "big man" at something. Most of those guys ended up behind the wheel of the boat powered by their checkbook.

I remember being struck back then by the fact that the guys who really loved boats and boat racing were usually handling the throttles and/or working on the boats.

Of course, my day was after the day of one guy working wheel and throttles, and the other guy navigating, and before the day of GPS course navigation. I remember a race in '85 off Lauderdale where only one boat in our class had only two crew, everyone else had three: helm, throttles, & navigator. (That was the race where, as throttle-man, I stuffed the GulfWind, a 30' Velocity, at nearly 70 mph )

This is not the boat, but it looked like this w/ triple 2.4 Mercs.